Monday, January 28, 2008

Husband+Closet Space=Disagreement

Allotted closet space how does this actually work?

Is it a 50/50 thing, 60/40 or what? My definition of allotted closet space is I will use as much as I need to. I think that is fair. I have more than he does but here is the division in the closet:

Him-124 items hanging (every fucking t-shirt he can cram in there)
Me-18 items hanging
Him-16 jeans-22 t-shirts folded on shelf
Me-33 jeans-60 t-shirts-snow pants-8 scrub pant-6 sweats (and its laundry day)-on shelf

I also have purses, girly stuff, wife beaters, tanks & belts and scarves in the 18 hanger count.

Hang on I will get to the point here

My husband has been bitching that I am over my “Allotted” closet space….well my response has been “I have a vagina and the words allotted closet space are not in my vocabulary” Very polite I think…so huge blowout about the space issue….I rearrange my stuff to attempt to appease him. Here is the fucked thing after all was said and done guess what his response was? Stumped?

“Where the Fuck did you get all these clothes?”

Ahhh it is true love.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Let’s just say I am a shitty blogger this week and leave it at that….k? Glad we have that cleared up.

My week has been interesting to say the least I am so tired at the end of the day the only thing I have on my mind is couch meets my ass=heaven. Get the picture? I have been working and being a product of monotony. I enjoy my job but I have to keep reminding myself that I have a job because I want to have one not cause I need one and that makes the days go a bit faster. Thank the Lord for that.

The beasts are adjusting to being with daddy in the morning and daddy is adjusting to being a part of the family…lol. I leave at 5:45am for work and get home around 4 each day so the kids have to depend on their dad for morning stuff and that has been interesting. The girls hate it because he is a tyrant and drops them of 20 min before I do so they bitch about it. They are also pissed because we have a GREAT bakery a block from the house and I take them there in the morning and daddy makes them eat cereal…gasp…the nerve of him pushing that healthy shit down their throats!!

Well that is it for today I will be back with some serious humor tomorrow I have a weeks worth of good stories but just got off work and my ass says this chair is to hard and it misses the couch…

Love you all,

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Heath Ledger's Death

I am saddened by the death of this lovely man, a wonderful actor and one of the most promising stars in Hollywood. A true performer.
My thoughts and prayers go out to his family & child.



Tribute to Heath Video

Monday, January 21, 2008

Evil People

Angry is what I am tonight enraged with the evil that is in this world let me tell you a story of a woman who is 47 and disabled.

This woman was divorced in 1996 from a man who commited adultery, beat his wife, mentally abused her and was cruel to her child. She then lost her son to this man and his new wife because she worked nights trying to support her little family of 2 while ex husband lived the good life off of his new wife and her wealthy family. This man caused so much pain to his former wife and their 3 children that it took 9 years for the 3 children to actually be in the same room….it was a divorce that could be put in the books…….it was horrible. Time passes and their lives have moved on man is still married and woman is still single and rebuilding her life, 12 years after the divorce woman is injured at work and after surgeries, tests, medication & excruciating pain woman is considered disabled by doctors and is rewarded with a insurance settlement. Man calls insurance company and says woman owes him back child support and insurance check is mailed to him. He swears he will return money then changes his mind and keeps it stating “It is for son”. Man does not spend money on son ever, woman gives money, buys all clothes, CD’s, pays for sporting equipment and fees for sports for son who is now 16. Man does not even provide winter coat or basic tennis shoes.

This man is also a tax evader and owns 2 businesses, a home and equipment all in new wifes name because he owes 130,000 in back taxes because he got caught evading taxes woman has paid 30,000 via income tax return to the tax bill since it occurred while married to man, man has paid nothing not a dime. Man did however brag how he made 90,000 in 3 months with his landscaping company this summer.

Want to know how man told woman he was keeping the money she received as an insurance settlement from being disabled at work? Her disability is her hands both hands to the point somedays she cannot drive, hold a cup or make a phone call…….Thanks for the trip to Vegas I have to go take my wife out to dinner.

This woman is my mother and tonight my heart is breaking for her she had counted on that money for months, she was not going to use that money frivolously she just wanted to buy a new couch hers is 15 years old and take her kids and grandkids to a local hotel that has waterslides for a night. I think after all she has been through that she wanted very little.

I do not know how man can sleep at night I am so brokenhearted for what he has done it seems like he can just never go away.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Just call me the lazy blogger this weekend. I have been out of my house exactly 2 times for a total of maybe 10 mins the rest of the time has been spent on the couch watching movies and being lazy. I did some cooking this weekend made some biscuits and gravy...mmm...yummy, homemade carmel rolls & beef stew with dumplings. It has been 11 below here all weekend and comfort food was a given. I may need an intervention cause I ate ice cream with EL Fudge cookies as a spoon....I know how totally FAT GIRL is that? My husband about died when he saw the ice cream incident. I swear it is hormones but who I have to go cause we are watching the Packers vs Giant game and we just went into overtime.
Love Ya I will be back tomorrow:)

Friday, January 18, 2008

This bear is hibernating until Sunday the temps are supposed to be in the -20's this weekend so I will be in sweats and watching movies. Have a great weekend!!!

Thursday, January 17, 2008

What is the deal with women in the work place why do they need to attempt to undermine other women when we are all working towards the same goal?

I am a woman that respects other woman I respect that most of us have to work because life is expensive and for a working mom there are extra responsibilities as we balance a family and a career. Why are there women out there that do not have any respect for that? Do not get it and I hate working in a profession that is mostly women but I love what I do and am not about to give that up.

I will however not allow someone/anyone to speak to me in a manner that is rude or degrading so that makes for an interesting work environment. I have the ability to go from 0-Bitch in 3.2 seconds if you rub me the wrong way. I am not saying I enjoy being a bitch but I am not about to let another woman act as thought she holds some power over my future….never going to happen.

Today was an interesting day at work lets just put it that way. A co-worker found out just how little it takes me to tell you to fuck off, I do not put up with dumb lazy people who do not pull their weight and have the nerve to assign work to me that is her responsibility. Well let’s just say I believe I solved an ongoing problem for the facility I work in…people like to delegate their jobs or disappear when there is work to be completed not today cause I told the delegater that she needed to do her own damn work and had my statement reiterated to her by my manager. I happily completed my work by 10am and had plenty of time to complete extra duties because I wanted to not because some lazy bitch told me to.

AHHHHHHHH all in a days work. Today’s lesson is do not mess with the Queen Mother of Bitches because you will not like the results.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

F'ing Drunk Drivers

Dear Drunk Buick Driver,

This morning I encountered your lovely rear end floating all across the white line on the interstate. I watched as you attempted to correct your driving in an effort to not be noticed I then watched you over correct and jerk your car into the right lane narrowly missing the car that sadly was already driving in that lane. I followed your swerving ass the entire 30 miles until I exited for work it was scary and made me late but I along with the entire line of cars behind you were to scared to pass just in case you decided to turn us into roadkill. No we were not playing follow the leader we were praying you would not kill any of us.

I understand that hey it was a Monday night woo hoo great excuse to get bombed must have been a rough one for you to still be wasted and driving at 6am. Office party get a bit wild? Close a big deal?

Personally I don’t give a flying fuck what your excuse was. I do however ask that the next time you get wasted that you not drive. Do not use the route I and other innocent people use to go to work….in fact could you just not drive? Drinking and driving do not mix for any reason.

I have survived a house fire and cancer this past year and I am pretty excited for the rest of my life. I have things to do and goals I intend to complete, I made a promise that includes me living my life long enough and good enough for my children, husband and family. I would be a little pissed if you took that away from me cause for real I am not going out like that.

I suggest that next time you get drunk you stay home because I bet you do not want your life to end prematurely and the chance that it will is very good if you continue to drink and drive.

Concerned Citizen

P.S. If I ever see you drunk driving again in my turf I will straight up follow you home dial 911 and proceed to beat the ever loving shit out of you and your vehicle you inconsiderate fucking moron.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Post surgical day 1

My Boys taking care of mama after surgery my spot was where the heating pad is...don't they look cute? Mouths open snoring like chainsaws it was great. BTW we still have not set the date stamp on the camera

Post surgical day 2....look he thinks I am number one!!

The desecration of my poor belly button.

There are some little known facts about me in the pictures the biggest one being I am a ink junkie I love tattoos nice ones, little ones, whimsy ones

My back that was done by Nei Ruffino you have seen her work if you have ever bought a My Little Pony she is the colorist for their packaging and she also does INCREDIBLE comic book color her work if Freaking Awesome. This is my lower back.

The stars are on the back of my neck.

The daisy on my left arm.

My handsome bald boy looking a bit dirty.

Thats It for tonight sorry for just throwing some pictures out and nothing good but I am tired and I have to work at 6am.



Sunday, January 13, 2008

Tonight I am very angry at my 2 daughters for being total complete horse asses and not keeping their room clean. I am not talking little messy I am talking full out pig shit hole....dirty dishes....candy wrappers....bits of paper....and about 200 of my DVD's laying on the floor out of there cases. Clean clothes laying everywhere on the floor that was the issue that made me blow a gasket tonight I went up stairs because they were being butt heads and would not lay down so I went up to give them a stern talking to well....the clothes that I had washed today and hung on hangers....the clothes they only had to walk up the stairs and hang in their closet were on the floor with half of them broken. I was LIVID they are 9 & 8 and are certainly able to hang clothes in their closet. I am done I have told them that when I get home from work their room will be cleaned out no toys, no colors, no fancy Bratz furniture, no nothing except the beds and the books. I took the Zen's, Gameboys, TV, DVD Player & lamps out already.
I refuse to be taken of advantage of I just cleaned their room a week and a half ago and gave them a 19in Plasma to watch movies on (no cable allowed in rooms except mom & dads) I even did the under the beds and entire closet, drawer, toy name I cleaned it. You cannot see the floor there is at least a sinkful of dishes......get the picture. I have decided that if they refuse to keep it clean and take care of their stuff they will no longer get stuff or be allowed to have stuff. I may be mean but it is time for tough love here. The screams of horror and tears you will hear tommorow at 4pm CST are from my girls coming home from school and finding out what a true heartless bitch their mother is. The thing that pisses me off the most is that their stuff and I mean all of their stuff is less than a year old if you remember in May we had a house fire and lost pretty much everything. All the stuff they had was destroyed so we have worked scraped and given up stuff so they can have stuff. Makes me so mad.
I need some opinions am I wrong for taking it all away after they have already lost so much?

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Been being a bit lazy this weekend spent most of the day today cleaning and washing laundry hubby is not to be trusted doing laundry so for the past week there has been only 3 loads done. Well for a family of five 3 loads is peanuts, I spent the day catching up. We had Brent's dad out for dinner and we grilled steaks while he played with the kids. Other than that not much here today. I do think the incsion on my right side has a bit of a hernia from me carrying up a basket of laundry I noticed today there is a marble sized hard lump under it and I felt a strange warm tearing sensation halfway up the basement stairs....not good.
In other news I will be heading back to the work force monday at 7am I am a little excited but sad that my days of hanging out with the little man are going to be weekends only. He is my buddy but he needs to go to daycare and I need to work.
I hope you all had a restful weekend

Friday, January 11, 2008

Saying Goodbye

An angel entered heaven last night while I slept unaware. I am very sad yet very comforted that Stephanie is no longer in any pain and no longer has to suffer from this horrible disease. Please head over to her page and sign her guestbook leave some words of comfort and peace for her family.
I was shocked when I read the journal this morning but felt at peace as she is definitly in a better place whole happy and healthy.
Goodbye Stephanie V I will treasure the things you taught me the lessons learned are ones I will cherish for a lifetime. I will live my life double for us both cause it just is not fair that we both mothers were diagnosed with this terrible disease, I feel guilty that I am still here but this is God's plan for me and I will do my best to see that I live up to being worthy of the 2nd chance I was given. I wish you were given one also but God had a different plan for you and I believe it was for you to be a testament of Faith and to teach those souls who may have been lost that God is good and if you trust in the Lord all things are possible. Our pathes may have never crossed here on earth but my lesson from you and your family may make it possible for them to cross in Heaven. Thank You for being my guiding light and my inspiration.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Texas Here I come!!

This post is gonna say Thursday but it is for Friday..Got it?

Ok I have started a new trend in my house we are gonna travel more....well I am and I am going to encourage my hubby to do the same so as a present for his b-day I am sending him to Vegas with his dad and 3-4 of his friends. He does not know this and will not find out until mid-March but as of today I am more than likely the most hated wife amoungst our circle of friends. I have asked some of his super close friends to go, well some of them are married and their wives do not support seperate trips to Vegas.

My good friend Kara left me a voicemail tonight that was Kara style that I have not ever heard directed at me....she was a bit bitchy....not a surprize cause I love Kara cause she is as bitchy as me but we never are to each other. Get that 2 bitches who do not bitch at eachother.

Her VM was pretty much saying her husband was going and what did she need to do for the tickets.....her tone of voice could have cured global warming and refroze iceburgs. I was confused cause when I asked her monday it was a definite no and she was not gonna tell him about the trip well she broke down and mentioned it to him tonight and well he is going and she is not happy. I feel bad that she is not happy and I understand her reasons, she is not insecure or untrusting she is actually pretty amazing but unhappy and I am sorry.

But me sending him there is cause I am going to Texas to visit my sister in law and my beautiful neices along with some other friends. I am going to rent a beach house in Galvestan for a week and be a beach bum hopefully with my friend Traci and maybe Jenny if she quits crying about how she hates the water and does not swim...suck it up whiner you know you want to go. Either way I will be sunning my ass on the Gulf Coast this summer for 2 how you like them apples. MMMMMMM tasty for me. I asked Tiff but she is going to Ireland in Sept and cannot afford 2 big trips:(
Oh well I am going to the beach and I am going to enjoy it,
So you coming Traci or what?

I know I have readers quite a few actually but where is the love? Tell me who you are I share my privates with you time to open up and show me yours:)


Whats up people no one wants me to know who they are? I am feeling a bit used here:(

Thats ok look to your ya:)

Tonight I am sitting here while my family sleeps trying to find some words to write in the guestbook of a young lady that has been in my thoughts for the past few months. I wrote here in October about a young Memphis woman who was diagnosed with cervical cancer and the odds were not very good for her. That sounds so trite and does not even touch what I feel about her outcome or the though of her losing her battle when I have just won mine.

I am so sad for her, sad for her daughter she will never see grow up, sad for her parent & siblings, sad for her friends and all the people who she has touched in her brief life. I am just torn up inside, I cannot even find the words to write in her guestbook so they know they are in my thoughts.

I am usually good with this my friends say I have a knack for having the right words, for Stephanie I do not there is nothing I could write that would actually convey what is in my heart.

I am having trouble with just this post it is hard to type when there are tears in the way I want to say this….never in my life has someone who I have never spoken a word to touched my heart like she has, strength, courage, love and un wavering faith in the Lord during a time when most would have lost faith she is that person most of us look at and think there is no way someone actually has all those qualities but she does. A sense of humor that even now I smile thinking of her prayers for poop and her honesty about her illness and what Gods plan is for her.

In the past weeks her mother has been updating her journal and I honestly believe Stephanie is the person she is because of her momma. I am honored to have been able to read the updates she has written and in them you can feel the strength, courage, love & faith she has, it is soul touching. I do not know this woman but she has touched my soul and given me something…a gift you may say she and Stephanie have brought that glimmer of faith back into my life and made me look at my relationship with God….let’s just say we have not been on a first name bases in about 2 years. I am working on changing that with a little help.

Today I went to read the new journal entry and saw that Stephanie is not doing good………holding on strong but her body is just slowly letting go and I realized I am not ready for her to go. I have learned so much from her in the past 4 months I am not ready for her journey to end……..that is why I cannot find the words to write to say anything and I am not ready to say goodbye.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

There are times in our lives where something is so much bigger than us all, here is one of those times.................................Final Post.................A blog entry from an American Soldier who died last thursday but had the forethought to compose his final blog post in advance in the event of his death.
Moving, touching & heartbreaking.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

I am sore and super bloated right now that is why there have been no new posts this weekend. I have been laying on the couch for the past 3 days being taken care of by my boys. Little man and Hubby have been good to me keeping me company and watching TV with me. We have watched the movie 300 2 times I cannot get enough of those fine warriors meow love it. I did get out of the house and went to a movie yesterday Alvin and the Chipmunks which was pretty funny in my drug induced state. This whole weekend is actually a bit blurry the damned Vicoprofen I am taking makes me a bit loopy and sleepy.
I will post a bit more in a few days sorry I am boring but I am recovering slowly but surely and for real I am having some serious pain makes it hard to be funny.

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Cancer FREE!!!

Can you say it? I am cancer free, for the first time in 1 year 2 months 9 days I can say that.
Tommorow I will wake up for my first cancer free day just saying that makes me want to cry.
The Dr was able to use the co2 laser to get clean margins on all sides and below now we just pray that when I have my 4 week pap there is nothing new growing.
I am home tonight we arrived home about 2, Sue was here with the kids and Traci came out and burned me some movies to watch....I think she needed to be here for herself as much as me I know that sounds funny but my Traci needs to do stuff in situations like this....she even brought me some food including a small Frosty. I went to bed and passed out cold from the pain meds I sleep up until bout half hour ago when the meds started to wear off. Not good...need to stay in front of it.
I have 3 inscions in the belly including a big one in my belly button which is full of dried blood for some reason I bleed alot today. When they removed the IV and taped up my hand I attempted to put on my bra and felt a gush down my back the IV site had a blow out and was seriously pumping out blood like I gashed an artery through the cotton balls, bandages and threw the tissues I grabbed quick to wipe it. Not good.
I will post some more tommorow and I have pictures that the Dr gave Brent to show him why I have so much pain I will scan them in and show'em off. They are pretty an upclose and personal veiw of my interior organs kidneys, bladder, uterous, tubes, ovaries & spine.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Well tomorrow is the day I have dreaded/anticipated since Feb, I am finally having the surgery. I am a little nervous and a bit scared of the pain afterwards. I have had ALOT of pain but it seems to me like the surgery pain will be different one I am not used to feeling or dealing with. That makes me a little anxious well alot actually.
I am happy that when I wake up my future will no longer be uncertain, I can start my life again I will be finishing school this year and starting my career as a working mom I have had the title of SAHM/Student for awhile now times are going to change that is for sure.
Say a little prayer for me I will heading in to the hospital at 5am I check in at 5:30 and have to have all labs, EKG and IV's done by 7:30 that is when we start. I am sure I will need a spot of Valium in the am andI will bawl my eyes out(I did last time) and of course there is the last words I utter to my Dr prior to each surgery
"Please don't kill me"
I know no pressure huh....but really please don't I have a life to live and dealing with Cancer has pretty much scared at least 10 years off my life span I do want to enjoy whats left.
So to my blogging buddies, my girl Traci who is stuck in Vegas for a wedding & my other friends and family....please hold I shall return in a few days.
P.S. Do not worry Traci I will be ok no crying when you read this....I miss you have fun and bring me home a damn Coyote Ugly T-shirt or I will beat 6 months we will take a girl trip to Vegas so find the hot spots I am counting on you.....mwah love you.
Today is my last day before surgery, I will be back later to post I have to pack a bag get my kids ready to be with a sitter. I have to run to pharmacy and get all medications and some post surgical stuff. I am nervous as hell so when I calm down I will give up some funnies.
Love ,