I was dinking around the house yesterday and looked at the calender and relized that my surgery is next week. Shit I am not ready so for the next few days I am gonna be super busy getting the house ready and all the laundry done. I will be out of commision for about 4-6 weeks so no housework for me, I do need to make things very SIMPLE for hubby or he will get frusturated.

I had my pre-op the 18th and am some what ready for it I am having a bit of anxiety. I hate having surgery and I have had 9 months to think about it. I lovingly refer to it as the gutting because really that is what is going down. I am having a total hysterectomy, Mcalls culdoplasty, bladder suspension & Cystoscopy I am not looking forward to it at all. I have had these super anxiety attacks from thinking about dying during the procedure or finding out that there is cancer in everything and we waited to long for the surgery and it has spread everywhere. I may need some professional help I will be in the front row at church Sunday that is for sure.