Thursday, November 15, 2007

Laughable shit for the day!

There are times in your life as a parent that you just need to stop and say “Oh Shit” well yesterday was one of them.

We had a teacher comp day so the kids were out at 1, I got out the craft supplies and told them to make some stuff while I laid down for an hour. Well during the time I was sleeping one of the girls (not mine) wrote a note to her boyfriend that was pretty graphic. I let them go up to the skate park when I got up so I could clean up and I found IT.

I being the immature person I am read the note and had to call Traci and share with her, we were howling with laughter for bout 15 min. Then Traci said OMG call her mother and give her the note. This is where things get even funnier because I not only have the youngest 4th grader in school I am the youngest parent of a 4th grader in our school district. I get a lot of shit about being the “Baby” and I am 30. I called her mother and went down to her house to give her the note.

I will add the entire time I was there I had to pinch myself to keep from busting up laughing. I know I am so immature and the situation would not be as funny if it was my kid….but it wasn’t and I think it is fucking funny. Her momma Lori was reading the cute side of the note and was looking at me like I was crazy for being concerned so I told her “Damn woman flip that shit over and read the good stuff”

How to have sex
By a 5th grader age 10
Step 1-Make out with our girlfriend
Step2-5 Take your clothes off
Step 6-Get into bed
Steps 7-10-Take your girlfriends clothes off
Step 11- Put your penis in her peach
Step 12-Bump her until she moans
Step 13-Then you sperm

Oh my I am laughing so hard now that I spilled my coffee, the girl that wrote it is here now waiting to walk to school with my girls so that just makes it even funnier to me. She is so embarrassed to even face me. I had to have the “Talk” with my girls last night because they both had gotten there information from the school playground. My version of the sex talk was basically adding to the steps.

Step 1-Be 18
Step 2- Be in love
Step 3- Go to the Dr for special medicine to have safe sex

I think I did a pretty good job of explaining it, to bad a 5th grader trumped me with the details. Like I told her mom at least the kids are learning the basics and nothing freaky. Ok I need to shut up now before I spend the entire day laughing about this.

Morning music for today……

Good Charlotte-I Don't Wanna Be In Love (Dance Floor Anthem)

3 Doors Down - Be Like That

Shinedown - Simple Man

Have a great day!!!

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