Tuesday, October 21, 2008

People are strange

Good morning. I am up early after a night of not sleeping so well. Yesterday I attempted to contact an old friend through one of their old friends. I figured that after 16 years of not knowing where my old classmates were it would be nice to catch up and see how their lives are. Well little did I know that an animosity from back when I was a freshman would still burn steady for this person.

I was very nervous to contact this person as I knew that I rated in the bottom of the food chain with them back when I was 15. I figured live and let live I am 31 years old now and honestly could not tell you why this person did not like except that they were jealous. Jealous of the time I spent with their friend. They may have been a little angry that I caused some heartache for the person I was looking for but my God, I was 15 and my parents chose to move back to SD not me. I had to go and when you are 15 getting a job and living alone are not exactly realistic goals. What happened was my parents decided to move to SD to start their own publishing business and I had to leave all my friends including my 1st love, his amazing sister and the friends I had made. It was devastating. I was a mess for weeks and it was hard. We kept in touch as much as possible until life and distance got in the way. That distance is a bitch when you do not drive let alone own a car.

Well yesterday I sent them a friend request on MySpace. I checked a few hours later and it was gone. Hmmm I am so new to using that service I resent it thinking I was technically challenged as usual. Right before I clicked send I stopped and thought damn what if that person denied it and that is why it is gone. So I Googled how to deny a friend and if there is a notice sent....I know I am lame like that. I did resend with a follow up note letting them know that I was not looking to be their BFF!!! Last night I checked again and sure enough email read and request denied.

I was a little shocked and a bit annoyed but not super surprised. I did not sleep well last night, I sat and tried to remember everything about this person and every single conversation to see where me, the queen of democracy and tact went wrong. I am an easy going person, I like people and usually people like me. I have friends from all over the world and have the same best girl friends from 16-17 years ago. I am wondering what kind of fatal character flaw I had at 15 to make someone not like me 17 years later.


Tammy said...

Don't worry about it! It's totally their loss! I think you're a great person! You can friend me on MySpace.

Theresa said...

This is most likely not going to make you feel any better, but I had to share. There is a girl I went to school with more than 10 years ago. If I even see her name on facebook (which happens because we know a lot of the same people) I feel sick. I was her bitch, and I can't seem to get past the hurt. I don't know if she has any clue that I feel like this. But you are right, people are strange. It might have been a tiny little thing that you didn't even notice, but it obviously impacted on her. Sometimes you just have to let things be :( Are you feeling worse now? Sorry!